like the dodo, i shall fly

captain's log (01.18.19):

Not much really to update.  Bored and waiting for my meds to kick in.

I started writing a few more songs.  Chords are pretty much finished.  Lyrics are halfway there.  O-oh, livin' on a prayer.

But I just don't know.

The thing about love is, it's like music, and the thing about music is, it's difficult to write when you aren't in love.  Get it?  Got it??  Good!!!

I've never known of anything else to write about.  I tried my hand at religion, but holy moly was that bad.  Haha..holy..religion..get it?  Got it??  Good!!!  Who's Moly??  Kiss, kiss, moly's lips.

I tried writing about politics.  I was worse at that than I was when it came to religion.

Now..I can plagiarize with the best of them, don't get me wrong.  I mean, 'elias' is almost completely stolen from 'Let The Right One In.'  So there are issues other than love involved there.

But I try to not do that often.

You see, the thing about plagiarism is, it's like water, and the thing about water is, some people need it to survive, but I want to go the rest of my life without water.

I'm not in love.  I feel love for my family.  I've been in a manic state since the beginning of the year.  Why so long..brain chemicals..and  My family is the reason for that which is that for that which is (prepositions - nailed it!!)  But I don't love anyone in a love love kinda way.  And..that's a weird feeling for me.  And I don't mean that in a bad way.  Like, 'ooohh, feel sorry for me!!'  I'm completely fine with it.  I absolutely hate who I become when I'm involved in a romantic relationship, and I really hope I never find love.  HA!!  But seriously, I'm seriously serious.

The problem that arises from this lack of love is my yugely successful music career.  I honestly don't know what to write about.  I try to write about other subjects, but the lyrics are usually just cheezy.

I have gone back a bit and written some about past love, but that's a bummer.  Not because I miss it.  I do when I think about it.  But I'm good now.  But because of what I mentioned earlier (please re-read this if you've already forgotten, you fools!!).  I hated who I was when I was in those relationships, and I'd rather not think about it.  Suffering from bipolar disorder, I try to avoid things that might pull me into what seems like a never-ending black hole of despair.  I hit those points anyway.  But best not to rush toward it.  Since I'm super manic right now, I know a crash is coming.  But let's just enjoy this for now.

Wow, tangent.

Your update is there is no update.

It's been almost a year and a half since my last album.  And I honestly don't see anything new being written at any point soon.

So, if you're reading this, sorry!! HA!!  lol  lmbo  haha

Seriously, if you're reading this, it probably isn't for the music.  You're probably me.  But if you aren't me and you're reading this, then thanks!!  How sweet!?!  heart  You're probably a family member and keeping tabs on me.

So I say this to you fine folks..